When you have a friend that has had a miscarriage there is a lot you can do to help her. Many times we are afraid to say anything because we don’t want to say the wrong thing but not saying anything at all can be just as bad. So what should you say and what shouldn’t you say. I have had three miscarriages myself and have heard a lot of things that were just not the right things to say. I have put together a list of things you can say and things you probably shouldn’t. Please be gentle with your friends that are coping with miscarriage. They need your support.  Things you should say.

• Do call her and tell her you are sorry for her loss.
  

• Do send her a card or flowers to show you care
  

• Do let her talk as much as she needs to or wants to.
  

• Do give her a hug to let her know you care.
  

• Do offer to help with housework, babysitting or other things that she may not feel up to doing.
  

• Do acknowledge her baby.
  

• It is okay to say I don’t know what to say or I don’t know how to help. Do call and check up on her. The pain does not go away in a couple days.
  

• Give her extra attention. She needs to feel like other people care about what she is going through.
  

• Do ask if she wants to talk about it.
  

Things you should not say.