 |
Further
Reading ...
|
|
7 Baskets That Help With Home Organization
These seven baskets are like magic wands; they provide instant home cleaning and home organizing solutions) Baskets are a perfect "tool" to use in organizing your home. They're often inexpensive, beautiful and functional items. And baskets are...
When Not To Begin Potty Training
Potty training can be a stressful experience for you and your child. It's best to start potty training when your child has an established daily routine and is not dealing with any additional stress. Potty training should be the only major change...
Responding to Criticism Without Being Defensive
In an actual war, to be attacked means to have our survival threatened. Thus, we might chose between surrender, withdrawal, or counterattack. When we feel attacked (criticized or judged) by others in conversation, we often move into that same...
Honesticity - bringing people together for household jobs
My partner and I have wondered for quite some time about how best to find local people for household jobs and services. We grew tired of looking in the Yellow Pages and randomly choosing one so we decided to set up a company called...
|
|
|
Coping With Divorce Anger
|
 |
Written By:
Tracy Achen
|
|
|
Successfully releasing your anger will help you begin healing after your divorce. Right now you may feel a great deal of rage at your ex-husband. You might be thinking that if it weren’t for him, your life wouldn’t be so messed up. These feelings are actually a necessary part of your healing.
Acknowledging Anger
Wouldn’t you just love to tell him what a sorry human being he is? How he didn’t respect you and treated you like dirt. Well, do It! Take a piece of paper and write down everything that he did wrong. Release all the anger that has been bottled up. Get it all off your chest. Tell him how he hurt your feelings and how you suffered to make the marriage work. Don’t be surprised if this letter goes on for pages, just get it all out.
Now for the important part.......Do Not Give Him This Letter. It would only re-enforce the impact that he had on your life. Burn it or throw it away. Allow yourself to release that anger and resentment. It’s over and done with. You’ve acknowledged the hurt and are now ready to figure out what went wrong and move on.
Gaining Insight
Gaining insight into why your marriage failed helps you to move on to healthier relationships in the future. Start by thinking about what attracted you to him in the first place. Maybe he was handsome, strong, or wealthy. What benefits did you get from the marriage? Maybe it was security, companionship, or a sense of belonging. These are the things that are important to your core being, and the difficulties in your marriage probably stemmed from threats to these areas.
Perspective
Knowing what part he played in the problems is - continued below ...
|
|
|
continued ...
easy, but you also need to recognize how you contributed. Owning up to responsibility is probably the hardest part.
Most women grew up with the image of the “White Knight” who rides in and takes charge. The princess falls in love and stands behind her man. The only problem is that this fairy tale usually doesn’t have a happy ending because the power of choice is removed. You are swept through life by circumstances and decisions of others.
If you can own up to your participation in the marriage, you have gained power. For example, by admitting that you stayed in a bad marriage for economic reasons, you therefore, can choose to find a good paying job and leave. When your perspective is one of choice, you gain power and control over your life.
Admitting that you put up with a bad situation out of choice allows you now to make decisions to do things differently in your new life. Once you accept responsibility for your life, be careful to not turn your anger inward. You did the best you could in your given situation. It's in the past, and you now have the power to move forward. Release the hold that anger has over helps you to regain control over your life again. You no longer need to feel like a victim, and your self esteem will begin to rise.
About the Author
Tracy Achen is the author of "DIVORCE 101: A Woman's Guide to Divorce", and publisher of a website to help women cope with divorce. At WomansDivorce.com we have one focus – helping women survive their divorce and rebuild their lives. For additional articles and information on divorce, visit the web site at http://www.womansdivorce.com
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
| _Additional Resources ... |
|
9 Easy Steps To A Pedicure
Before putting on those sexy, comfortable open toe shoes make sure your feet skin is in good condition. With these easy nine steps you too will have silky feet. So go ahead get ready to do your own pedicure.soak your feet for 10-15 minutes in warm...
Unconditional Love
To tell you the truth, I'm a little disillusioned with the term unconditional love, lately. It's just not "natural". The phrase has been used for decades, by psychologists, therapists, A.A. types and the overall spiritually minded to describe how...
Lose Weight Today, and Keep it Off Permanently, with Cliff Kuhn, M.D.'s Fun Factor Diet
P.T. Barnum, who dedicated his life to entertaining the masses, often relied on size-related adjectives to sell his attractions. His posters and announcements were peppered with words like mammoth, extraordinary, colossal, and gargantuan.
...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
